One summer a few years ago, I picked my son up from camp. He was in a special day camp where children spent a week with experts in their fields of interest. The camp offered everything from basketball, soccer and tennis to acting, magic and chess. It was my first time picking him up, so I wasn’t sure where to go or how to find him.
When I arrived I knew how easy it was. The children were divided into groups with a counselor and a large sign showing parents where each group stood. Observations and thoughts popped up as I scanned the area. The signs were great, but I realized that I rarely needed to know where my son was most likely. With just one glance, I could guess which groups of kids were playing soccer and which groups were there for computer coding.
My intention here is not to judge, criticize, or stereotype. My goal is to point out that people (even at a young age) tend to gravitate towards themselves. They are grouped into tribes or clans based on their comfort zones, personality traits, and interests.Makes me think about the Sorting Hat of Harry potter Placed students at home upon arrival at Hogwarts. But Harry knew which house he wanted to live in, and he thought, “She’s not Slytherin.” It is our nature to seek comfort in ourselves.
So how does this observation relate to pediatricians? When I was in medical school, it was time to choose which residency I wanted to apply for. In the case of , pediatricians differed considerably from surgeons.
I know this is a crude generalization, but it’s the foundation of marketing and branding. The pediatrician general avatar is the kindest, most caring, patient and kindest doctor avatar. Someone who focuses on building long-term relationships and puts the patient’s needs ahead of their own.
Now, while this is all good, there is a downside to this persona, and pediatricians are feeling it today more than ever.
In the never-ending desire to help others, to be liked, to give, and to give more, pediatricians risk going too far. We create our own suffering because we don’t know how to set love boundaries. They say that if we do too much, our good qualities will become a liability and our emotional and physical health will be at risk.
Bringing these qualities into the world of healthcare, which is increasingly demanding by patients, payers, and healthcare systems, is difficult enough, but in the midst of the respiratory crisis we face today. In the midst of it, it’s even worse.
So I ask all pediatricians. How are you doing? Are you giving more than you have? Keep your great qualities. They make you the doctor and the person you are, but learn to practice moderation. Support yourself as diligently as you support your patients. If you can’t do it yourself, do it for others. The world needs you at its best!
Jennifer Scheer, M.D.is a pediatrician.
This post appeared in Kevin MD.
